March 23, 2012

The Linen/Silk Anniversary

The history of Royals baseball is littered with infamous dates that mark tragic turns of events and missteps that set the team back years, decimated the fan base, and made the organization a laughingstock.

Those of us who remain fans attempt to expunge these dates from our minds and suppress these memories, usually through burning Ken Harvey jerseys and indulging in dangerous amounts of grain-based alcohol, but RWC is not willing to just let these travesties go.  Because according to every 8th grade Social Studies teacher/track and field coach in America, those who forget the past are doomed to repeat it.

That's why we're starting a new series in which we'll look back at these awful dates in Royals history.  For our first post in this series, we shall look back at March 23, 2007, exactly four years ago.

Let's crack open our handy reference guide:


Poor Pichardo's Almanack, first published in 1759 by an ancestor of Hipolito Pichardo, originally focused on Dominican culture, climate, and agriculture.  Most of the early editions contain far too much information about the optimal harvesting time for plantains and cheapest methods of rum production.  Beginning in the 1940s, it became strictly a guide to the best meringue albums.

However, the publication underwent a fundamental shift in content twenty years ago. In 1992, Poor Pichardo's Almanack became the preeminent source for all things Royal, and no fan should be without a copy. You can find this for under three bucks (plus shipping) on most reputable retail and auction sites, though be aware the native Spanish has been translated to a hybrid of Old and Middle English in some sort of confused appeal to the nostalgia of dead people. It's still a fine publication and we heartily recommend you order a copy, but be sure to keep a thesaurus handy.

Now let's go ahead and look back at March 23, 2007.

Quoth the Almanack:


Did you guys get all that?  Not sure if we did on our end.  Something about semen?

Anyway, here's how we covered the trade on Royales With Cheese four years ago: ¿Dos Tony PeƱas? ¡Mierda!  That's probably only slightly easier to read than the almanac entry.

Go Royals!  You're the Best!

2 comments:

  1. And snarky we shall be, for thee, my lord, for thee

    ReplyDelete
  2. That ain't English!

    ReplyDelete

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