March 22, 2012

Spring Training Recap

Hi guys! Last week I was in Arizona watching the Kan City Royals. A lot of stuff happened, but I wasn't really paying attention.

I'll be honest with ya, I spent most of the week getting drunk on the outfield grass and adjusting my sunglasses so no one could tell I was staring at the ASU co-eds the whole time.

Anyway, I did not forget my mission entirely. #StopYuni (yeah, we're still doing this) was in full effect across the entire Phoenix area.

Here I am spreading the gospel in Scottsdale.

Then, I got this older couple involved at Surprise Stadium.

I had to tell them that Yuni was a local pederast, but I'm pretty sure they disapprove of a .292 OBP.

A few days in, though, I realized my little sign wasn't enough. I had to do more.

A scoreboard message. Yes. That would do it. That would end this madness.

I called up the Surprise Stadium marketing department to inquire. They were more than happy to feature a message at the next game - for $50. Unfortunately, when I told them what I wanted, they said they could not help me. Denied.

Luckily, the folks at Peoria Sports Complex (home of the Padres and Mariners) did not balk at my request. So, following a message wishing Connor Banks a Happy 9th birthday, this appeared on the screen for seven magical seconds.

Mission accomplished. And this one was only $40. Suckers.

Alright, back to the team. All these guys got hurt while I was there! What the heck?

I'm pretty sure Bruce Chen will get hurt, too. Just look at how he gets ready to start a game. Come on, Chen!

Finally, I finished up the week with a classic Straight Cash Homey moment.

"Mom, thanks for getting me this Rick Ankiel jersey from the Majestic outlet store! Now I don't have to wear that Terrence Long jersey to games anymore!"

15 Days until the Opener against the The Angels Angels of Anaheim.

Go Royals! You're the best!


  1. Noticed a typo in the post. It should be The Angels Angels of Anaheim Angels.

  2. I hate the spanish language so I always anglify everything. Just has Joe Cross, Jr. or Joe Table

  3. And I always Angelfy everything.


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