May 15, 2012

Emil is Rounding Up Summertime Movies For You Part #2

Here is part #2 of my movie prevues for this summer.  Go read part one of this if you ain't yet!

I seen so many good movies so fart his summer.  It was The 3 Stooges and The Band of Pirate Misfits and The Titanic in 3D on Ice!  That title is just me joking because the HMO Titanic crashed into ice and the kid from What is Eating Gilbert Grapes dies on ice water!

I also seen The Avengors Movie. Every person seem to love The Avengors Movie but I thought it had to much talking in it and not to much fighting in it which I find disappoint.  I also wish Scarlet Jo Hanson would have not had such bright red hair in it cuz she look like Raggedy Andy with boobs! And I like the superheros in it but it should have also been Warmachine and Natalie Portnam and Wolverine and Dare Devil and Green Hornet and all them other guys also.  It was still a awesome movie but I don't love it like every person seem to. 

Anyways, I hope that you are enjoying movies this summer!  It is getting hotter so that mean there are more coming all the time.  I have for you today more summer movies to talk about so you will know both what is gone be good and what is gone be bad in them.  Let's get crackling!

Here are more movies coming out soon--

The Moon Rise Kingdom (May 25)
The Good: This movie is about two kids who fall in love in the summer time and they run away together and that is something all of us can relate about.  Bill Murray is in it and that dude is real funny!

The Bads: Two Things are bad.  One is that Bruce Willis is in it but he is wearing glasses so I bet he won't be doing much killings of bad guys.  Two is this movie is in the 1960s so it may got hippies in it!

The High School (June 1)
The Good: This kid smokes the chronic but their gone be a drug test and he could lost his scholarship to college because of his pee has weed in it. So he and his friend decide to get all of the school to get high through selling them pot brownies in the bake sale! It looks like it will be real funny, specially if you smoke a blunt first!

The Bads: This movie was made two years ago but is just now going to be in movie theaters so I wonder if it really sucks.  Also, for any kids who can read this you should not smoke the chronic unless you live in some place where it is legal!

Magadascar 3 D: Europe Most Wanted (June 8)
The Good: Chris Rock is so funny in these movies! They were in Africa last time but in the third one of the Madagascar triology the animals are in Europe.  They are on the run from the French cops so they join a circus! 

The BAD: I hate to say this but I want their to be more movies that are new and not just the same movies I already seen but in new places! Also, these penguins in these movies are not as cute as the Happy Feet penguins. 

The Promothus (June 8)
The Goods: This is a prequil to Alien and that is one of my favorite scarry movies of all times!  I'm super pumped for watching people in space get smoked by them wet leather monsters and hopefully their will be at least one part where a alien bust out of somebody's chest!

The Bad: No Ripley and no Predators in this and the trailer don't even show no aliens. But I still think it gone be real scary and dope!

The Rock of the Ages (June 15)
The Good:  Musicals can be good, like The Rocky Whore Pitcher Show. Tom Cruise can be good, like The Days of Thunder.  But put them in one movie?  People who like the American Idle show will like it, but they think everthing should be karoke and I don't!

The Bad: This look so bad.  All the music is from awful hair bands like Deaf Lepperd, Poison, REM Speedwagon, White Snakes, The Journey, and Eddie's Money.  That music was bad back then, dummies!  And "The Rock of the Ages" was a hymn, so this shit so blasphamy it make me sick to myself that its titled this. Get a clue, Holly Weird! 

That Is My Boy (June 15)
This is Good: Adam Sandler just played himself and his sister in this other movie but that one was real bad.  Now he playing himself and his own son in this movie which to me looks better!  I bet he will learn to be a good dad and that family is more important than money and we will laugh at his drunk yelling!

The Bad:  There is a very tabboo subject matter in this because Adam Sandler knocks up his teacher when he is a kid.  That is one of the worse crimes there is so it may offend a lot of people.  Also, Vanilla Ice and Rex Ryan are in this and that is stupid.

The Brave One (June 22)
The Good: This another cartoon movie but this one got a girl as the main carachter so that's new!  It is in Scottland back in the day and this girl is braver than the boys but she open up a Pandormus box of beasts and has to be even braver than she was to stop it and get her clan back toghether.

The Bad:  How come there are no dragons in this like in the last Scottish cartoon movie? The dragons were cute and looked like cats!

Looking for Friends at the End of the World (June 22)
The Good: Steve Carroll and a younger chick go driving acrossed the country becuase a meteor is gone kill every one and they want to have fun before death happens.  It look funny with people being crazy and doing drugs and having good times because who cares with the world ending?

This Bad:  We all know how this gone end with everyone dieing at the end of the movie! That is pretty sad so I'm not sure if I want to see it because I like movies where death is funny or its scary or bad guys that die, but not when it is Steve Carroll because I love The 40 Year Virgin!

Abraham Lincoln, the Vampire Slayer (June 22) 
The GOOD:  This is the true story of how before Honest Abe had a beard a vampire killed his mom in the log cabin!  So he grew up and use a axe to kill the vampires. 

The Bad: It sounds like it would be funny but its not a comedy I don't think.  Maybe there will be some jokes in it though, like how he got his snowman hat and facial wart and stuff like that!

Well that is it for part two of the movies coming out.  I am happy to let you know I found out there will be Dorfs in the Snow White movie so we can all stop freaking out about there being no dorfs in it.  I still hoping they sing "Hi Ho!"

See you with part three soon!

Go Movies!  Your the Best!


  1. Kevin Brown8:34 PM

    Thank god there gone be Dorfs

  2. Anonymous9:30 PM

    Dear Emil,

    Who be your favrit dorf?

  3. Dopey is the cute one of the dorfs but I do wear a night shirt with Grumpy on it so I gone have to go with the Grump on this.


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