June 6, 2012

Sign of the Beast


It was six years ago today, June 6, 2006, A/K/A 06/06/06, that the Kansas City Royals and their fans were damned by a mediocre #1 overall draft pick.


We won't get too heavy handed with the devil angle, as that really isn't fair to Luke Hochevar.  I'm just saying, there was clearly an omen right there on the calendar.  Hell, the shitty Omen remake was released on that day.

And that's not all: If you remove the k, o, and h's from his name, it becomes Luecevar (Lucifer). Also, did you know the contract was bound in human flesh and inked in human blood? And that the cloven hooves of Scott Boras represented Hochevar? And that Luke's entourage included Lee Moloch, Belial Jones, Marty Mammon, and Scott Beelzebub?

Most damning of all?  Take a look at the negative of the above picture:


I'm just saying, there were signs.

But enough with that. Luke isn't really demonic in any way. He's just a really, really, truly underwhelming pitcher. He seems so evil and garners so much hate because of what he could have been and because the Royals have been too stubborn to try anything else with him or send him along his way. 

And he's why June 6, 2006, will live on in infamy in Kansas City.

Let's see what Poor Pichardo's Almanack has to say about this date in Royals history.



Nailed it.

Go Equinox Tallystick!  You're the Best!

1 comment:

  1. Anonymous8:17 PM

    That's fucking poetry.

    ReplyDelete

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