August 12, 2012

So Many Damn Movies with Emil! Part Six?

Wut up again all you movie lovers!  I am back with the rest of the August movies!  We only got three more weeks of summer movies and then Labor Day will show up and ruin all the movies until next summer.  That makes me so sad to think about it. Still a lot of the movies coming at the end here look real good and I prolly gone see most of these. 


The Odd Live of Timmy Green (August 17)
Good: Disney making a movie here about a guy and a girl who want a baby. They write notes about this baby and put them in a hole in the ground and the next day the baby is alive by magic! That's a cut idea and I think it look like good family movie about a magic kid.

The Bad: I worried that this baby is a cabbage patch kid cuz how he gone come out of the ground like he do?  He is a plantman or something. Also, Timmy Green the perfect magic kid and most kids ain't much good so they could feel bad about theirselves seeing this and get accomplex. Good job, Disney!


The Expandables Number Two (August 17)
The Good: This a shit-kicking movie with Sly Stone, Arnold, John McLane, Dorf Lundgren, and Jet Lee fighting dudes with big guns! This movie give me a hard one!

This Bad: The first one could have been better acting but that should be better now cuz the second one got Chuck Norris and John Claud Van Dam! These are violent movies with lots of killins so don't bring any girls cuz this movies for the men!


The Par-a-Norman (August 17)
The Goods: This kid Norman sees ghosts and this movie is claymated so look like a Halloween type movie for kids that grown people will like also. This like a 20th century Mad Monster Party!

The Bad: Just cuz its claymated don't mean kids won't be scared of them ghosts so don't be dumb and take a baby to this movie cuz that baby just gone cry and ruin The Par-a-Norman for errbody!


The Sparkling (August 17)
This GOod: Jordan Sparkles playing a Motown singer and she got to beat the odds to become a star singer and not tear up her family life. Gone have good music and good dramatics!

The Bads: WHitney Houston playing Sparkles' mom but Whitney died of doing speedballs so that will make most of the audience real sad and they might not see it cuz she dead.


The Hit and Run (August 24)
The Good: This is a action car chase movie and those are always real fun to watch for the jumps and cop cars crashing! Tom Arnold is in this and I like him from The Soul Plane and The Stupids.

The Bad:  Dex Shepherd is the main guy in this and he was on Punked with Ashton Kouture so evertime I see him in a movie I wonder if its real or if its a punking! Most of the time its real but you got to stay after the credits to be for sure.


The Apparation (August 24)
The Good: These dumb kids make ghosts by using they minds and then the ghosts try to kill them a lot! Pretty freaky shit from the look of this!

Bad: I love scarey movies with lots of killings but a lot of horror movies suck a lot specially if they got dumb kids in them so this one might not be so good.  We'll see!


The Premium Rush (August 24)
The Good: This a chase movie but not with cars!  The kid from 30 Rock From the Sun is a bike messager who got a package people want so they chase him on his bike and try to murder him!  Pretty exiting biking stunts make this look intents!

The Bad: Sorry Holly Wood, biking still real lame even with stunts and murders going on! He should of been on a Harley Davidson or at least a Segway prolly.


The Thunder Strikes! (August 24)
Good: This kid who sucks at basketball make a wish that he got Kevin Durant skills and then he does get the game and Durant lose his game!  Look like a good movie for a family who likes the Oklahoma City Thunders!

Teh Bad: I don't believe this could really happen in real life!  How can a kid start balling because of a wish and why does that mean Durant starts to be suckling?


The Lawless (August 31)
This Good: Shyla LaBeef and his hillbilly brothers are bootlegging moonshine and got to fight the cops about it back during the Probation when moonshine wasn't legit. 

BAD: These hillbilly bootleggers are crooks but the movie making us root for them over the cops and that's not good for kids to be seeing cuz there gone make moonshine and get shot by cops now and all because of some dumb movie!


The Possessions (August 31)
So Good: This look like The Exorcist for Jews! It got a Dibbuk monster in a box that posessed a little girl to make her a demonoid and now her parents got to get them a Rabbi to get the Dibbuk out of her mouth!  I got real scared during the prevue for this one!

The Bad: Now people might get scared of Jews but that is dumb because most demonoids are Christians or Agnostics anyway and not Jews!


Well thats all for the summer movies for this summer!  I hope you seen a bunch of good ones and didn't see none of the bad ones!

Go Movies! Your the Best!

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