August 21, 2013

Emil Wraps Up His Summer 2013 Movie Preview

SUMMER IS OVER! SUMMER IS OVER! All you dumb kids going back to school ain't got much chance of watching all the good movies that Holly Wood got up their sleeves but that's okay when the end of summer movies is for adults mostly.

I made this new picture bout how summer is over from a box call Summer's Eve! I hope you like it.

Here is the movies you got to pick from if you want to see movies the last couple weeks of August:

The World Ends (August 23)
The guys from Shawn of the Dead go to bars to get their drank on but instead they end up getting their fight on with a bunch of robots at these bars who got flashlights for eyes and blue ink for their blood. I like the movies these guys make but I have a hard time understanding what they say with their Shakespear accents!

The Grandmasters (August 23)
This a straight up kung fun movie bout some dude name Hip Man who got to beat up a bunch of guys in the rain and in the snow and right next to a train track that has a train coming through. There is also a woman who fights and Hip Man loves her I think. This look like a balls out action movie with awesome kicks, punches, sward fighting, and also some romance for the laddies!

The Moral Instruments: Bone City (August 23)
This girl thinks she is a normal girl but then one day her mom get kill and she finds out she is one of the Shadow Hunters! That means her and a bunch of other Shadow Hunters who are male models who got neck tattoos go round killing demons that only they can see but nobody else can see them. This movie is a fantasy for the girls but also got action and monsters for the dudes so I think you should take a date to this one.

Your Next (August 23)
This look like some messed up scary stuff! A family is just chilling in their nice house one nite when a bunch of dudes wearing goat masks do a home invasion on them and start murdering them. That's the hole plot. Goats are real cute animals but this movie gone ruin that for errbody. I like horror movies but this is the type of movie for weird creeps who I wish don't exist!

Close Circuit (August 28)
I hoped this got Johnny Five from Short Circuit but this some british bullshit! This film a bunch of british people who call judges my lord and they defending muslim terrorists for terrorizing London. But errything in London on video cameras cuz they got no freedoms outside America so this is where the title Close Circuit come from. This a taught thriller for people who ain't like action and collage professers who like boring Shakespear talking in movies!

Get Away (August 30)
Ethan Hawk got his wife kidnapped from him so he got to be the driver for a bunch of crooks who talk to him thru his car like on Nightrider! The bad guys make him kidnap some dumb girl from the Disney Channel who is like 40 years younger then Ethan Hawk and then there are a shitload of explosions. This the type of movie for people who don't care any more.


New Direction: These Is Us (August 30)
This a documentery bout some dumb british kids who make real bad music. Not Hansen and not the Jonas Brother but something call New Direction. They are skinny little kids with dumb haircuts and Shakespear accents and girls and old ladies want to do sex to them. This the kind of movie that make me think the world got no hope.

So that's all the summer movies. When September rolls round that's when summer ends and fall begins. There gone be some good fall movies like Vein Diesel fighting Iguanadons in Riddick 3 and Johnny Knoxville dressing up like a Grandpa who is bad in Bad Grandpa but mostly fall should be spent watching football, dranking beers, trick or treating, and making your wish list for Christmas presents!

I hope you had a good summer mine was ok not great but that's life you got to keep on balling don't never stop!

I love you.

Go Movies! Your the Best!

1 comment:

  1. Henry David Thoreau5:46 PM

    I love you, too.


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