August 30, 2013

Holding out for a Herotage

First things first, the Royals swept the Twins for the third time this season, and the second time in less than a month. Here's our obligatory sweep graphic:

For years and years, I rarely had to create sweep images, but not this season. This is probably the worst I've ever made, but I've never liked Ron Gardenhire and he might be getting fired. It would be a shame if I'd never put this bearded fat ass next to a Fantasia broom.

Now that that's out of the way, we can can get to some better (though not by much) photoshopping.
You may have noticed Nike has been rolling out a series of stupid invisible ballplayer shirts this summer, such as this one featuring Yu Darvish:

Nike has screwed the pooch in a couple of ways. One, I'm not sure I'd call the players they've chosen "heroic." I mean, can you even judge a guy who's only been in the league for a couple of seasons a hero? That's the second thing, how are these young players representative of "heritage?" And lastly, as always, Nike completely ignored our favorite team.

We here at Royales with Cheese think that's horseshit, and we're doing something about it. I'm talking, of course, about creating our very own Royals Herotage shirts!

About a month back, we shared a bunch of George Brett Herotage shirts. Today, we've created some more designs featuring vintage Royals. Specifically, we wanted to pay tribute to some of our favorite Royals that we've unfortunately lost to that big stadium in the sky. These are players that we feel represent the made-up term "Herotage."

While you may think this is the shittiest tribute ever to their memory, you have to remember that this is a pretty shitty blog.

First, we have the winningest pitcher in Royals history, Paul Splittorff. He played for 15 seasons and was a broadcaster for 24. He was a Royal through and through.

Love that crazy leg kick.

Next up is one of the greatest closers in the club's history, Dan Quisenberry.

Probably the greatest submarine pitcher in league history, too.

Our next shirt features one of my personal favorite players, catcher Darrell Porter.

Gotta love those thick glasses.

And we'll wrap up with the only manager to ever win a World Series for the Royals, the great Dick Howser.

You'll never see Ned Yost out on the field showing emotion like Howser did.

Well, that's it for today. Hopefully, we'll squeeze in another Herotage post before the end of the season.

Go Three-Day Weekends! You're the Best!


  1. wyzburro4:17 PM

    I would love that shirt of Splitt or Howser in real life.

  2. Thanks for the comment, wyzburro! I'd make them for real if I wasn't worried about Nike and MLB suing me for what little money I have. Maybe someday we'll got some cool shirts like these for real.


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