August 12, 2013

You Can't Make a Country Breakfast Without a Few Sticks of Butter

A brilliant artist has finally done it. Gwen Lundell of Malvern, Iowa, has found a way to combine two things Royals fans love: Billy Butler and saturated fat. Actually, I think Billy Butler himself is a combination of Billy Butler and saturated fat, but I digress.

As you may know, Gwen Lundell is one of the preeminent butter sculptors in the Midwest. Each year, she contributes multiple sculptures to the Iowa State Fair. In the past, she's sculpted all the classics, from Butter Cows to Butter Pigs to Butter Wilson Phillips. 
However, for 2013, she's gone away from the barnyard animal sculptures to craft only those figures she considers heroic in some way. At the Iowa State Fair this year, you can see a Butter Seal Team Six, a Butter Mamie Eisenhower, a Butter Wonder Woman, a Butter Kirk Ferentz, a Butter Taylor Swift, a Butter Jesus Christ, and yes, a Butter Billy Butler, aptly named "Billy Butter."

"Billy Butter" is truly impressive, standing at Butler's listed height and weight of 6'1" and 240 pounds. Likely, the sculpture is taller but weighs less than Butler's real, unlisted stats. He is housed in an airtight freezer, only viewable through a glass partition. According to the fact sheet at the Iowa State Fair, "Billy Butter" could supply enough topping for 2,600 large tubs of popcorn, 83,000 biscuits, 12,000 baked potatoes, and 4,000 cobs of corn. Also of interest, if you were to eat "Billy Butter" raw in one sitting, it is believed you would suffer 47 simultaneous heart attacks and die.

Royales with Cheese is proud to present Gwen Lundell's "Billy Butter":

As previously stated, the sculpture will be making its way to the Royals Museum of Art in about a week, but it's highly recommended you try to get up to Iowa to see it in person before the end of the fair on August 18th. Aside from Billy Butter, there's ever so much to do, including a harmonica contest, a demolition derby, a heaviest/lightest pigeon contest, a quilt raffle, a Foghat concert, a plant sale, a lumberjack show, and, of course, a variety of deep-fried foods on a stick.

Editor's Note: Funding for this post in the form of $2.83 was granted through the Iowa Board of Tourism. Iowa: Fields of Opportunity

Go Billy Butter! You Clog Base Paths and Arteries!

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